


My Friends Mishap

by danehemmings



Series: Naruto Hogwarts AU [4]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, F/F, Fluff and Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:14:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24897505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danehemmings/pseuds/danehemmings
Summary: Sakura has really had it with these two boys. Naruto has been staring at the same spot in Hogwarts, A History, for over twenty minutes. His foot is tapping excessively and sweat is dripping down his forehead. Sasuke, on the other hand, has completed all three papers due for Transfiguration this semester in those twenty minutes, and is making notations on Sakura’s Charms paper. It’d be helpful, if she hadn't already handed it in to Tobirama a week ago, and gotten high marks.“Boys,” Sakura says warningly, “Has something happened?”“What?” They answer her simultaneously, then look at each other with distaste.~Or: Sasuke and Naruto see something they shouldn't, and it interrupts Sakura's day
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Hyuuga Hinata, Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Obito, Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Series: Naruto Hogwarts AU [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1801573
Comments: 4
Kudos: 140





	My Friends Mishap

**Author's Note:**

> Bit of a snippet of another thing I'm slowly writing which more or less details Sakura's years at Hogwarts, but who knows if that will ever be finished so I hope you enjoy this for now!

Sakura has really had it with these two boys. Naruto has been staring at the same spot in Hogwarts, A History, for over twenty minutes. His foot is tapping excessively and sweat is dripping down his forehead. Sasuke, on the other hand, has completed all three papers due for Transfiguration this semester in those twenty minutes, and is making notations on Sakura’s Charms paper. It’d be helpful, if she hadn't already handed it in to Tobirama a week ago, and gotten high marks.

Normally, she was happy to let the two boys work it out among themselves. But that was her paper Sasuke was ruining, and if Naruto didn’t stop his foot tapping she may have to cut it off of him.

“Boys,” Sakura says warningly, “Has something happened?”

“What?” They answer her simultaneously, then look at each other with distaste. 

“Naruto is being his usual dumbass self,” Sasuke says. “This essay is terrible, Sakura.”

Sakura wonders how Mikoto can be under the illusion that her son is an angel, when he is, in fact, the devil himself. “Tobirama seemed to think otherwise when he handed it back to me yesterday.” A smile to hide her fury.

Sasuke’s face goes blank, and he gathers up his papers and is out of the library before Sakura can react. Naruto finally stops his incessant tapping and wipes the sweat from his brow.

“I thought he’d never leave!” Naruto exclaims.

Sakura pinches her nose, “Tell me what’s going on so I don’t have to go through this again at lunch.”

“Oh,” Naruto looks around the library worriedly, “It's nothing.” The only people around them are some Hufflepuff first years, and Sakura doesn’t need to express her feelings for Naruto to hear them.

“Fine! It’s not really a big deal though,” Naruto leans forward, and Sakura notices his cheeks turning red.

“You two aren’t fighting again?” Sakura crosses her arms. Usually, things are a bigger deal than Naruto knows.

“No. No!” Naruto shakes his head, “We were just, uh, hanging out in Kakashi’s office-”

“You broke into Kakashi’s office-”  
“He let us in!” Naruto yells, eyes wide. Sakura spots Shizune making a beeline for them and starts packing up her stuff.

“Dammit,” Naruto curses, grabbing his things as well. They manage to get out of sight before the librarian can catch up to them.

“She’ll have our heads tomorrow,” Sakura says as they wander out into the corridor. 

“I was trying not to have my head bitten off,” Naruto mutters. Sakura feels a flash of guilt, but she’s not to be distracted from the matter at hand.

“You were in Kakashi’s office?”

“Uh, yeah, and we were like -well, someone walked in.” Naruto’s eyes start going blank again, as if he’s looking at that same line in Hogwarts, A History. 

“You got caught making out with Sasuke?” Sakura guesses. The two of them had been dancing around each other for months, probably since they met at age seven, if she was being honest. It was cute fifth year, but now at the tail end of sixth year it was mostly annoying.

“What?” Naruto looks baffled, “No!”

Sakura sighs. “Okay. Who walked in then?”

“Obito walked in, that’s who!” Naruto says, like that explains everything.

It was well known among the students that Obito and Kakashi were married, so Sakura didn’t find it extraordinary that Obito would appear in his husband’s place of work. Her face must’ve shown that she was unimpressed, because Naruto groans and buries his face in his hands. Sakura hopes the story is worth all the drama, at this point. Even if it ends in Obito knifing them.

Naruto finally pulls himself together and leans in close to whisper, “He was wearing ladies underwear!” He says it as though the words burn him.

“He was walking around the school just in a thong?” Sakura says, slightly disgusted. She had no problem with whatever their professors decided to do in their freetime, but knowing the details of Kakashi and Obito’s sex life was potentially scarring.

“He took off his robes the moment he stepped in there! Sasuke and I couldn’t warn him we were there,” Naruto scrunches up his face. “I didn’t want to know what a man looks like in - in that.”

Sakura can’t help herself- she lets out a chuckle. Naruto gaped at her, wounded.

“I’m suffering through trauma, Sakura!”

“Mh-hm,” Sakura laughs. Naruto keeps grumbling all the way to the third floor, where they part ways. Sakura still thinks it's funny, so long as she doesn’t think too deeply about it. Naruto must be happy to be going to charms, where Tobirama is his professor, instead of heading off to DADA with Sakura.

They’re with the Slytherins this year, and Sakura sits in her usual seat behind Sasuke and his friend Suigetsu. She feels rather smug, knowing Sasuke will be suffering for the whole class.

Sai plops himself in the chair beside her. “You look like Ino,” He says.

Sakura stops staring at the back of Sasuke’s head, “What?”

“That face you’re making, Ino is always making it while she forces Shikamaru to do her work for her,” Sai explains. He used to be truly awful at detecting emotions, but this one fits, more or less. Come to think of it, Sakura hasn’t had to kick him in a good month or two. Everyone she’s known has really grown up since first year, and sometimes it still takes her by surprise. Except for Sasuke, of course, who has remained as ridiculously angsty as ever.

“It's the face you make when you’re enjoying someone’s suffering,” Sakura smiles. Sai shakes his head, like he doesn’t think she’s all there. 

“Did someone hex you?”

Sakura can almost see the hairs rising on Sasuke’s neck. He’s pretending to be absorbed in whatever Suigetsu’s saying, but she knows he knows she knows.

“Yeah, it was this spell, ‘thong-itus’. Really messed with me.” Sakura answers. Sai seems mildly alarmed, until Sasuke turns around and gives them both his best ‘Uchiha-glare’. But Sakura and Sai, who’ve been taking Astronomy with Madara Uchiha since fourth year, aren’t fazed.

“Did Naruto wear a thong for you?” Sai asks. Sakura laughs harder than is probably appropriate. Several of her fellow Ravenclaws turn to stare.  
“Shut up,” Sasuke warns. Suigetsu looks between them all tiredly. He’s probably sick of them being obnoxious every class, but really this is a special circumstance.

“Have you had potions yet this week? I’m sure your cousin will be happy to see you.” Sakura can’t stop laughing.

“Does this relate, then, to why Kakashi is later than normal?” Sai asks with an amused smile. 

“I think it might,” Sakura says.. Sasuke briefly makes his eyes look even more evil, then turns back around in his seat. Suigetsu shakes his head at Sai and Sakura and turns around too.

“I did nothing,” Sai says, the picture of innocence.

Sai had been right. Half of the period passes, and there’s still no sign of Kakashi. Sakura fears their Defense professor has thrown himself off the astronomy tower, until the classroom door swings open to reveal Madara Uchiha himself. 

The towering professor stomps his way over to Sasuke, his usual scowl gracing his face. “There’s been an emergency concerning our family,” Madara today has captured Kakashi’s normal ‘I’d rather be anywhere else’ tone of voice.

Sasuke has a look on his face that says he’d rather be shoved screaming into the dirt like a Mandrake baby than be here. “I don’t think I should be involved..” He says.

Madara’s scowl somehow deepens. “I am the head of your house, and I’m telling you to get to my office or get out of this school!”

“I’ll take expulsion,” Sasuke says calmly. Sakura snorts, and Sai kicks her shin. She pulls it together as Madara eyes her thoughtfully.

“I think Miss Haruno here would be happy to inform your classmates of the exact details of why I had to expel you,” Madara says. It’s times like these that Sakura is happy she always gets high marks. Madara may have simply beheaded anyone else who laughed at his nephew.

Sasuke, clearly feeling betrayed, stands to gather his things. “Great decision,” Madara says, and stomps back out of the classroom without a glance backwards.

“Have fun,” Sakura says to Sasuke as he leaves. He flips her off.

~~~ 

Later that day, after classes have ended, Sakura is relaxing next to the Lake with Hinata. She and the Hufflepuff have been spending more and more time together lately, something for which Sakura is eternally grateful. Hinata doesn’t get annoying like Naruto or Sasuke, and she doesn’t have deep seated emotional issues like Sai does. Hinata is uncomplicated, like a clear glass of water, and Sakura is endlessly refreshed and calmed when she gets to spend time with her.

Which is why it’s particularly upsetting to watch as Naruto and Sasuke stroll towards them “Do you think they’ve definitely seen us?” Sakura asks, dropping her blueberry muffin back into Hinata’s picnic basket. “Maybe we can just find another spot to sit?”

Hinata shakes her head, “They’re our friends, Sakura. We can’t ignore them.” Sakura agrees, but friends are also not supposed to ruin peaceful times with other friends. 

“We can catch up with them later?” Hinata could possibly go for that option. 

She doesn’t, “Don’t you want to know what happened with the ‘thong’ thing? Or maybe you could apologize to Sasuke for earlier?”

“All I did was laugh in the face of his suffering. It was a good thing for a friend to do, because his ego is always out of control.” The two boys are almost within earshot now, and Sakura will have words with them about this later.

Hinata waves at the boys, “You’re right, but that doesn’t make it okay.” She was a real saint, Hinata, for recognizing Sasuke’s evil. Not even Ino understands how awful Sasuke is, and he’s been cruelest of all to her.

Sakura forces a smile for Naruto, and gives Sasuke a nod. Hinata invites them both to sit on the blanket, and she offers them muffins. Sakura considers if Hinata is too saintly. Maybe. 

“So, Sakura told me what happened today,” Hinata says as they all munch on her baked goods, “You could’ve gone about that better, I think.” 

Not too saintly. Sasuke takes a massive bite of muffin and stares out over the lake as if summoning it to drown them all. Naruto, on the other hand, is completely at ease. She’s always admired Naruto’s ability to forgive and forget. Nothing can stay under his skin for too long, with the exception of Sasuke.

“What happened at this emergency family meeting?” Sakura prompts..

Sasuke doesn’t answer immediately, as he’s taking the time to chew, but Naruto has no problem spitting crumbs at them as he says, “Obito and Kakashi apologized to us. You know I’ve never seen Kakashi so flustered. It was hilarious!”

“It was awful,” Sasuke grumbles, “I’ll never go to Potions again.”

Sakura tries to mask her snort as a cough. It doesn’t really work, but she sees the corner of Hinata’s mouth twitch upwards. 

“Perhaps you shouldn’t be sneaking into Professor Kakashi’s office,” Hinata advises. Naruto nods vigorously in agreement.

“Is that all you came here to tell us?” Sakura asks pointedly, because she was enjoying her private time with Hinata, and she’d been considering asking Hinata on a date to Hogsmeade before they’d spotted the boys.

Hinata folds the liner her muffin was in, cheeks going a bit pink when she notices Sakura watching. She’d say yes, Sakura decides. The moment the boys left her sight, she was going to ask Hinata out. She couldn’t keep roasting Sasuke and Naruto for mooning over each other if she was mooning over Hinata.

But it would take more than a pointed question to make Naruto realize he was killing the moment. He shakes his head, and reaches around Sasuke’s and Hinata’s shoulders to pull them in close. Sasuke jerks out of Naruto’s grasp, but that leaves him sitting shoulder to shoulder with Sakura, who can’t help but laugh. Sasuke throws her a dirty look as Naruto starts talking.

“You know why we were in Kakashi’s office?”

To further annoy Sasuke and for other reasons, Sakura mirrors Naruto’s position, throwing her arms around Hinata and Sasuke. Sadly, this action doesn’t allow her time to answer Naruto’s question with a yes, you and Sasuke were making out, before Hinata can shake her head no, which prompts Naruto to proceed.

“We were looking for a letter from the Ministry! Yesterday I overheard my mom asking Kakashi if he’d heard from Hana yet - she’s totally next in line for Minister, ya know- and Kakashi was really skittish about his answer.”

Sakura recalls Kakashi being especially disengaged the past few weeks, but she’d assumed it had more to do with the looming war than with the Ministry of Magic.

“Yesterday Obito cried and ended class forty minutes early,” Sasuke adds.  
Sakura remembers Hinata telling her about that. Apparently, Gaara had accidentally admitted that he’d been terrified of Obito in his first year. Sai and Sakura had found it pretty funny, but Hinata felt bad for Obito, who couldn’t help how intimidating his scars made him.

“So,” Naruto continues, “We were wondering if Kakashi was going to be sent away, or something. Nothing else would make Obito so on edge!”

Hinata frowns, and Sakura can tell they are both equally confused. Sometimes, when Sasuke and Naruto are bouncing ideas off of each other, things can get out of hand.

“What, like Kakashi is going to be sent to the mountains to make an alliance with giants, or something?”

Naruto’s mouth drops open. “That makes so much more sense! We thought he was going to be sent to Azkaban!”

It’s so ridiculously far fetched that even Hinata lets out a giggle. Sakura will have a good cry-laugh later when she remembers this moment.

“That is so fucking outrageous,” she tells them, “Azkaban”? For what?”

Sasuke levels her with a serious look. “Kakashi isn’t as squeaky clean as you believe. It’s entirely possible.”

He’s just trying to save face, Sakura thinks. She’d say so, too, but then this conversation would become an argument lasting for hours, and she’d never have the opportunity to ask Hinata to go with her to Hogsmeade Saturday.

“Um,” Hinata starts, but Naruto interupts her.

“Sasuke, you’re just trying to save face!” 

Sakura groans internally as Sasuke’s eyes narrow. He elbows Naruto in the ribs. “It was your idea in the first place, loser, I don’t need to save face!”

The two of them stand up, Naruto’s arm leaving Hinata’s shoulder as he rises. Sakura scoots away from Sasuke, but keeps her arm around Hinata.

“Yeah?” Naruto says, “I can admit when I’m wrong, Uchiha!”

Sasuke tells Naruto to stick his wand somewhere Sakura would rather not think about, and then the two of them start yelling. It’s closer to being alone than before, so Sakura might as well take this chance.

“Hinata?”

Hinata is still blushing, and Sakura realizes she never put on deodorant this morning as she stares into Hinata’s pale irises. Their faces are only an inch apart, and Sakura notices that Hinata has a faint freckle on the left side of her nose. She also notices how smelly her armpit is, exposed to the air due to her arm on Hinata’s shoulders.

“Um,” Sakura is having second thoughts about this being her moment. Would she agree to date Hinata if the Hufflepuff had smelly armpits? She deliberates for only a second. Yes, she would date Hinata even if Hinata decided to stop showering forever.

She removes her arm anyways, lowering it and taking the muffin liner from Hinata’s fingers. The smell is once again masked, and Sakura grabs Hinata’s hands.

“Would you, uh, maybe want to go with me to Hogsmeade Saturday? On a date?” Sakura is blushing, too, now. She tries to tune out Naruto and Sasuke’s yelling.

Hinata’s mouth pops open slightly, as if she can’t quite believe what Sakura’s asking. She looks down at their hands briefly, and when she looks up again she’s smiling. 

“I’d like that,” Hinata says. Sakura grins back, and momentarily forgets her armpits as she and Hinata hug. A kiss would be nice, too, but Sakura isn’t about to rush things along, and especially not in front of the boys.

After their embrace ends, she and Hinata just kind of stare at each other, smiling stupidly. Then Naruto steps backwards, narrowly missing the picnic basket, and Hinata seems to remember something.

“Boys!” she says, standing and holding a hand out to help Sakura up, too.

Naruto and Sasuke are both red in the face. Sasuke’s hands are balled into fists at his side. This has become too normal for them, Sakura thinks. But she and Hinata can worry about resolving that after their date.

Hinata asking for their attention has Sasuke and Naruto shutting up almost immediately. Hinata isn’t the type of person to punch and threaten them into listening, like Sakura. Instead, she seems to naturally command respect from those around her. When Hinata speaks, you listen, because she likely has something important to say. And Sakura will punch you if you don’t.  
Still, Sasuke is grinding his teeth and casting Naruto dirty looks.

“Kiba told me this morning,” Hinata says, “that Hana agreed to be Professor Kakashi and Obito’s surrogate.”

Naruto gapes at her like a fish. Sasuke looks as if Hinata had pointed her wand at him and said “Avada Kedavra.” 

“No, no, no, no,” Sasuke says, and he bows his head. As soon as the shock is over, Naruto literally jumps with joy. Sakura feels similarly.

“Kakashi and Obito are having a baby!” He yells. “Oh, I’ve got to tell my mom!”

He runs off before they can remind him his mother likely knows already. Sakura leans right to brush her shoulder against Hinata’s, feeling giddy. It’s been a good day, she reflects. 

Sasuke looks between her and Hinata and grimances. “Bye,” he says, and jogs after Naruto.

~~

On Monday, Sakura is feeling very content. Her date with Hinata was successful. The only incident that had briefly ruined the romance was turning the wrong corner and watching as Suigetsu melted into a puddle after Karin pointed her wand at him. But they’d done a 180 quickly enough to escape, and that was that.

Now, Sakura needs to get down to business, and find out whether or not her favorite professor is expecting. She rushes down to the dungeons before classes start, knowing that Kakashi is more likely to be in his husband’s classroom than his own, even if he is supposed to be teaching a class in five minutes.

She has to dodge a few third years, but she makes it inside before the bell rings to signal the start of class.

Obito is sitting at his desk, flipping through a stack of notes she knows will someday become a potions textbook, while Kakashi is standing behind him with his arms crossed. The sight of Kakashi not in his usual relaxed stance clues in Sakura to Naruto and Sasuke’s presence before she spots them sitting on top of the student’s desk closest to Obito.

She stops to stand next to the desk, nodding at Naruto. She just raises her eyebrows at Kakashi and Obito, figuring that the question has already been asked.

Obito sighs, long suffering, and Sakura is strongly reminded of Madara doing the same thing whenever the Headmaster interrupts their astronomy class. She suppresses her giggle.

Kakashi glances down at his husband, some wordless exchange passing between them. Then, he uncrosses his arms and gestures at Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto.

Obito sighs again. “It’s really too early to be telling anyone,” he says, but Naruto lets out a loud whoop! And jumps off the desk to celebrate.

“Congratulations, Professors,” Sakura says with a grin. Obito returns the smile, before he stands to help Kakashi admonish Naruto for yelling.

“Just keep it quiet for now, please,” Kakashi begs, and Naruto agrees, but really it’s up to Sasuke and Sakura to make sure Naruto doesn’t get overexcited and shout it to the world.

When Sakura looks to ensure Sasuke understands this as well as she does, she notices he has a small smile on his face, one of the rare genuine ones reserved only for his family, and Naruto. She pretends not to see, knowing how Sasuke likes to pretend to not care.

The bell rings, signaling that Obito’s class is starting, and so he shooes them all out the door, pausing only to give Kakashi a quick peck on his masked lips. 

Before he can close the door all the way, Sakura can’t resist saying, “Let’s hope this kid doesn’t ever see you in a thong.”

There’s only time for Obito’s eyes to widen, and then the door snaps closed. Sasuke chokes on air, and ends up with a coughing fit so bad, Kakashi forgets to be upset with Sakura and steps towards him with concern, but upon seeing Kakashi coming towards him, Sasuke gags.

Sakura and Naruto take the opportunity to turn down a secret passageway and out of sight, laughing all the while.

“He’s gonna fucking kill you,” Naruto says when they catch their breath. But that just makes them both laugh harder, because there’s absolutely no way Sasuke would even land one hit on her.

She does spend the next weekend in detention, with Obito taking 20 points from Ravenclaw the moment she steps back inside his classroom, but it was worth it.


End file.
